{"id":378,"date":"2006-12-24T15:09:23","date_gmt":"2006-12-24T23:09:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/guapacha.com\/2006\/two-near-death-experiences\/"},"modified":"2006-12-24T15:09:23","modified_gmt":"2006-12-24T23:09:23","slug":"two-near-death-experiences","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/?p=378","title":{"rendered":"Two Near-Death Experiences"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I have fairly vivid dreams almost every night but, like most people, rarely remember many details when I wake up. Last night, though, I was a Marine fighting an alien invasion (I think I am playing too much Resistance on the PS3). Just as we are about to hit the streets to kick some alien ass, there was the following exchange:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n<em>Commander<\/em>: we&#8217;re marines and one thing we do better than the aliens is salute so if you&#8217;re not sure who to shoot, get them to salute<br \/>\n<em>Me<\/em>: but Sir some of us are British and our salutes are weak<br \/>\n<em>Commander<\/em>: then you are going to die\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>And earlier this week our spa needed more chlorine and some pH lessening agent. Rather than make two trips outside I put the liquid chlorine into a cup and then poured the pH-down powder. Boom, instant reaction, much frothing chemicals and release of toxic gases. The smell was terrible and I inhaled enough of it to encourage some vomiting and difficulty breathing for about two hours. I don&#8217;t do doctors but I almost caved into the wife&#8217;s demands that we go to the ER. On the plus side, my cold seems to have disappeared.<\/p>\n<p>And a Merry Christmas to you all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have fairly vivid dreams almost every night but, like most people, rarely remember many details when I wake up. Last night, though, I was a Marine fighting an alien invasion (I think I am playing too much Resistance on the PS3). Just as we are about to hit the streets to kick some alien [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[61,64,183],"class_list":["post-378","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-death","tag-dreams","tag-stupid"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/378","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=378"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/378\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=378"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=378"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/guapacha.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=378"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}